So another pretty good day babe…. had a really good talk with Connor…he is starting to open up to me. He does really dig Lilly, he just doesn’t know how to tell her or if he should. I told him only he will know when/if it is right but at some point he should express his feelings for her. We talked about not holding emotions inside and I explained to him in general how it can do more harm than good by not letting your feelings be known… to you and the person you wish to express them to. He is a really good kid…in spite of me…. I really wasn’t there for him like I should have been. I can only hope I can fix that. Man I got a laundry list of shit I need to do to make things right by people. I told him that at some point though when he feels its right, he needs to seize the moment…you know like the title of this blog…lol Say Anything!
Money is real tight, man how did I let us get here…..I have really made a stink of things over the years.I really don’t deserve you but I am hesitant to say that to you. Things at least appear to be going good, and while I know your not “there” we have been talking/holding conversations in ways we have not done in years. I am cautiously hopeful.If you only knew how scared and insecure about all of this I am…..but then that would cause you to be scared and uncertain. I don’t want that. I want you to smile with me! Don’t worry, the kids have no Idea of all my insecurities and doubts, I have set a pretty good schedule for them. They are doing good… well aside from Connor missing school and all…lol. But hey, he and I had another good talk over that. He really is the best of both of us….cute little Connor, every-time I look at him I see your face and I miss you more and more……Like you have been saying, we can do this! I miss you, Good Night Donna.