Oh What a Night

I have been trying to keep this blog going nightly for my own sanity, but as you know….sometime life happens. Cant believe its only been 2 weeks. I am not sure about you but for me it seems like an eternity. Every morning I wake up and roll over and look for you, and every morning your not there. I even woke up this morning and left the room without turning on any lights because I didn’t want to wake you…only to step out of the room have the dogs almost run me down and realize…hey dipshit she is not here…lol All week everybody has been talking to me about the superbowl but for some reason I just don’t care. It seems like such a small insignificant thing right now. I think I am coming into my own on the running the household stuff.

I will definitely make life easier for you on our first posting together. I can easily handle the house and kids now, while you focus on your job and career. I have a lot of doubts in myself and my abilities but I just know somehow I can do it now.  Thank you for sending the money, i did not want to tell you how bad it really was here, it has been hard hiding it from the kids….Arwen has asked the last couple nights if I was going to eat, I just made excuses about not feeling well or not being hungry and just sat with them and talked, truth was there was simply not enough for all four of us.

I am really glad we are getting to chat as much as we are, I don’t know if your feelings are changing at all, but I am happy to at least be able to talk to you.Your presence for me is like beauty and the beast….you are my Belle.  I know being away from the kids is super hard on you….I am sorry it happened this way. I am sorry I did not do better by you and them…but i will try to make it up to all of you.  Well I need to get to bed…… Good Night Donna.

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